Tag Archives: Truth

God is in Our Suffering

 

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On August 28, 2017 after 16 hours of labor and an epidural that decided to stop working towards the end, we welcomed our precious little girl Eula Ellen Myers into the world at 9:03pm. She was born exactly 3 years to the day that I got adopted and gained a family. The Lord is so good. Our chunky monkey weighed in at 9 pounds 4 ounces and was 21 inches tall.

Two days into parenthood our little girl was up all night not feeling well. She cried for hours and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. I’ve been through a lot of pain both physically and emotionally. I’ve walked a dark road full of abuse with a pain in my heart that I don’t even know how describe. I have memories in my head that are full of suffering and agony. I thought that I had learned how to handle any pain thrown at me.

As I held my precious baby girl in my arms and rocked her as she cried, my heart hurt in a way I didn’t know was ever possible. With tears streaming down my face, I kissed her chunky cheek and whispered into her ear, “I’m so sorry Eula. I love you so much.” I prayed hard that the Lord would help my little Ellie feel better. I learned in that moment that nothing is more painful than watching your child suffer.

Thankfully, the next morning was better. Ellie’s tummy wasn’t upset and she slept peacefully in my arms. As I watched her beautiful eyes flutter in and out of sleep, I realized something that will forever bring peace to my heart when my past tries to come back and haunt me. The pain I experienced while watching my little girl suffer was the same pain God felt when He watched me suffer growing up.

I looked at my little girls fingers and toes. I gently kissed her little head and thought about the miracle God created inside my womb. She’s a gift I’ve been given and I’m so blessed to be her momma. I thought about all that she’s going to get to do and the amazing family she’s surrounded with.

I thought about what she’s not going to have to experience. She will never go without love and will always be raised to follow the Lord. She has an amazing daddy that she has wrapped around her finger and an adopted family to look up to. Her daddy’s family loves her so much and are such great example’s too. God has given her a new legacy. She will never have to walk the road I walked. There will be so many new experiences we get to do together. Trips to the zoo, family vacations, and maybe we will get to take our first trip to disney land together one day. 

This won’t be the only time I will watch my child suffer. She’s got her own heart, body, and mind that I can guide in the right direction but in the end, she will make her own choices. She will get sick and she will get scrapes. She will fall down hard but I will raise her to get back up and keep trying.

I didn’t realize just how much my pain hurt God until I experienced it myself. Somehow, that realization makes me feel a lot better… When I was going through abuse and hardship I had always told myself that I wasn’t alone but now that I’m a parent, I actually believe it.

~ Lovelle ❤

Life and the Storms: This, Too, Shall Pass

It was a bright and sunny day and the temperature was perfect. Although I felt like winter lasted forever, the amazing weather I saw made me think that things were going to lighten up and boy, was I excited. I was ready for the warmer weather, and all that came with it like trips to the lake, pretty flowers, and walks outside.

I looked at my phone to find a notification from a local news station informing me that the area was under a severe thunderstorm warning. I scoffed at my phone in disbelief because from what I had observed, there was no way a storm was possible. The weather was amazing and there wasn’t even a cloud in the sky. A couple hours later the meteorologist proved me wrong, and the storm came down hard.

As I sat on my couch listening to the rain fall and thunder bellow outside my house I couldn’t help but think that this is what life is all about…

I was reminded that life is full of up’s and downs. The adversary has undesired surprises hidden in every corner. One moment things are fine and then bam, you are hit with an unexpected expense or sickness. Happiness is drowned in the midst of a storm. Through all the hardships that come from life, I am so thankful that my God is in control.

This too shall pass

{These graphics are free for you to enjoy}

Are you going through a storm right now? Were you hit with a situation that seemed to knock you right off of your feet? Take heart, my dear friend, because our troubles won’t last forever. Our loving God is full of comfort and guidance. Even if you can’t see Him, He is present in your situation and there is hope because  this, too, shall pass

Thirteen Miles of Grace

I jumped out of bed as quickly as I could. Normally 6:17am hardly qualifies as late on a Saturday morning but in this case it did because I was supposed to be at the starting line of my half marathon that was thirty minutes away.

Even though the race didn’t start until 7am, it was necessary to get there 30 minutes early because there were 2,600 other runners that needed to line up too. Thanks to my alarm clock I was now running extremely late. I had less than 15 minutes to reach my destination.

I threw on my clothes and grabbed my stuff. My husband and I headed out the door as quickly as we could. God had favor on me and I arrived to the half marathon with 5 minutes to spare. I had a few problems though…

My late schedule caused me to run out the door without eating anything or even going to the bathroom. This meant that I had to run 13.1 miles with an empty stomach and full bladder. Running a half marathon is hard enough. Frankly, I didn’t need anything else to make it worse.

As I stood there in running position, waiting on the race to start Paul’s words from 2nd Corinthians 12:9 began to echo in my head. Over and over again I heard.

Grace

{These graphics are free for you to enjoy}

So when the race began I held on to those words. As my feet hit the pavement I thanked God for my ability to run and begged him to help me get through this race. I finished the race in awesome timing. My goal was to run the half marathon in 2 hours in 15 minutes.

did it in 2 hours and 14 minutes. Yup, I beat my time by one minute even though I was running on no food. God’s power worked in my weakness. He helped me through the whole thing. 

Have you ever had one of those moments when you just thought that you couldn’t do it because you didn’t feel strong enough? Well heres the thing, you aren’t strong enough, but your Creator is.

His power works best in your weakness so sit back because He has got your back.

~Lovelle ❤

The Waiting Game: What I wish I Was Told When I Was Single

I had this dream that was tucked inside my heart so tightly that hardly anyone knew about it. Everyone in the world saw a completely content and independent woman, but deep down all I wanted was to be married.

I was ashamed of this dream and at times, I felt that I obsessed over it too much. After all, a woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her. I was taught in church that I should be content and my impression of content was to be happy single.

The problem I had, was that I wasn’t happy single. Instead I was stuck with an unwanted desire… 

I would pray to my Creator because I wanted Him to take away my feelings. I was sick of guilt and I thought that my desire for a husband meant that I wasn’t content.

After years of struggling and an extreme amount of guilt, God gave me an answer to my request but it didn’t involve Him taking away my desire. He gave it to me through a simple scripture.

I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please Him.
~1 Corinthians 7:32

I learned through this scripture, that there is nothing wrong with my desire for a husband. God created me that way. I learned that I should embrace this chapter of my life by spending my time doing the Lord’s work and thinking about how to please Him. This verse taught me what it really means to be content.

Being content means that you are making the best of your situation. The fact is, we all have unwanted feelings. Paul says it best in 2nd Corinthians. In two powerful verses he tells us how to be content in the midst of hardships.

I asked the Lord three times to take it away from me. He answered me, “I am all you need. I give you My loving-favor. My power works best in weak people.” I am happy to be weak and have troubles so I can have Christ’s power in me.
~ 2 Corinthians 12:8-9

Despite what I was taught in church, desiring a husband isn’t a bad thing and it does not mean that I am not content.

You see, God designed us with a desire for companionship. Since the beginning of time, man has struggled with loneliness. We see that in the book of Genesis. Adam was lonely and needed a helper so God made Eve {Genesis 2}. When Adam saw her he praised God because he thought that she was a wonderful gift.

“At last!” the man exclaimed “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh!”
~Genesis 2:23

The Christian culture tells us to be content with singleness, and yes that is true but often times we think that a desire for a spouse means that we aren’t. It causes us to feel shame because we think that our desire means that we aren’t having faith or trusting in God. How we handle that situation often involves us feeling guilty, stuffing our feelings inside, and hiding them instead of embracing them. 

I am married now and I absolutely love it. Ironically enough, I met my husband a couple months after God changed my perspective but as I look back at the four years I struggled with singleness there are a few things I wish I would have been told because they would have helped me through that season in my life and it probably would have made my time as a single woman more useful.

If you are struggling with singleness I want you to know that your feelings are completely normal, in fact, they are a gift from God. I’ll be the first to admit that being single is REALLY hard. Friends are great but on those cold days, there is something really depressing about not having someone to snuggle with.

Here’s how you get through it: Focus on advancing God’s kingdom. Take advantage of your time, and minister to people.

Hispowerinweakness

{These graphics are free for you to enjoy}

p.s. If you’ve ever struggled with feeling like you need to be perfect, my mom Holley Gerth’s new book will encourage you. You’re Loved No Matter What: Freeing Your Heart from the Need to Be Perfect.

The New Site: A Place Where You Can Grow

I fell in love with the Sunflower last September when I attended an amazing retreat called WHATEVER Camp Create in Kansas. My favorite color had a whole new meaning when I looked at those beautiful, strong, and large flowers all bunched up together in a field of magnificence. What I loved most about the Sunflower was its design…

Every person who has seen a Sunflower knows of its large head but if you look really close you can see that underneath the flower is a strong stem holding it up. In that moment when I was standing in a field full of flowers that were taller than me I realized something; God is my stem and he holds me up too.

Life is hard and at times overwhelming. It’s so difficult to stay rooted in the truth when the adversary does everything in his power to knock you down.

Colossians 2:7 says “Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.”

Genesis 2:7 Says that the LORD God formed man from the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.

Grow

{These graphics are free for you to enjoy}

My theme for this website is “Seeds for your Soul”. My hope is that my words can help encourage you and keep you rooted in the truth through every situation you face.

Another fun fact about the Sunflower is it’s ability to spread rapidly and as a living soul made by our Creator we have the ability to spread love and encouragement rapidly as well!

On my website I have some free gifts for you! They are located in the area titled “Free Seeds to Sow. Based on the verse in Ecclesiastes 11:1 which says, “Send your grain across the seas, and in time, profits will flow back to you.”  These encouraging creations are yours to enjoy, download, and share however you would like.

With that being said, my prayer for you can be summed up in 2 simple verses:

I pray that from His glorious, unlimited resources He will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make His home in your hearts as you trust in Him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong.
~Ephesians 3:16-17

Welcome to the new site! I hope you find it enjoyable and useful!

I owe a big thank you to Lisa Larson, the mastermind behind all this awesomeness! You can find her at her blog thecopperanchor.com.

~ Lovelle ❤

Healing from Abuse: Turning to God

I see a little boy going up to a his friend’s house because the girl hadn’t shown up for school. He finds the girl terrified and as the girl shakes with fear he suddenly realizes why she never wanted to go home all of those times before…

Jenny! Where are you!?!” her dad yells from the back porch.

The scared little girl grabs the boy’s hand and says, “run Forrest!” The intoxicated man throws the beer bottle on the ground and starts running after them. They ran as fast as they could only to realize that they can’t outrun her dad.

With one last ounce of hope she grabs the boys hand, gets down on her knees and yells in desperation, “pray with me Forrest!” and over and over again the girl says,

Dear God,
make me a bird so I can fly far far away…

The scene in Forrest Gump ends and the past begins to flood my mind. I begin to remember all of those nights that I would be on my knees asking God to take me out of my abusive home. I also remember how it didn’t happen.

As my husband holds me with his strong and protective arms and I am reminded of God’s mysterious ways. It’s easy to blame God and accuse him of not being there but what if I told you that He was holding you through every bad trial you endured?

While you look at yourself in the mirror, feeling dirty and when you feed into all the lies, God is staring back with the most adoring eyes.

When you feel alone and defeated, He is there with you. When you fall, He is holding you up. He is the strength that sustains you and He is the one deciding your steps when you feel you can’t go on anymore.

I know because it’s in my lowest that I feel God most of all…

Faith-is-Confidence-by-HolleyGerth.com_

{These graphics are free for you to enjoy}

Yes, I was abused.

Yes, at random times the pain still occurs.

However, I am not my pain or my past and neither are you.

The worst thing you can do to yourself is ask God “Why?” I don’t know why my step dad did what he did and I don’t care because my God is bigger than what was done to me. His love overcame it all.

God did what no man can do. He redeemed me. On that cross, He alone made me new. So in those hard times I will run to the feet of my Savior because answers won’t make me feel any better. Only His love can.

When Peter told his listeners in 1 Peter 4:8 that love covers a multitude of sins I know that he wasn’t only talking about the sins they committed. I believe that he was referencing the sins that were done to us, too.

You see, it takes love to save, but it takes love to forgive. Jesus was the first example of that when He was being beaten and spat at on that cross. We see true redemption in the words, “Lord forgive them for they do not know what they have done.”

Abuse is real and healing is a process. I love that even in my pain, when I can barely even whisper, “Lord make me feel better” I know without a doubt that God is there and He is better than what I am going through now.

That fact may not take away the pain but it helps me sustain. If you’re hurting today I just want you to know that God says it’s going to be okay…

~ Lovelle ❤

Another Form of Worship: Stepping Out and Loving People

As my feet hit the pavement my mind immediately began to relax. With my worship music in my ears I couldn’t help but think that maybe my runs are a way to worship God. It’s a way for me to drown out the world and focus on Him. It’s literally a way to run the race set before me. 

As the sidewalk turns my eyes lock on an older woman in what looked to be her late forties using a walker. Her face showed pain and just ahead of her was a little girl riding a bike with tricycle wheels. As hard as the woman tried, she just couldn’t keep up so on my way back around the trail I saw her up ahead, sitting on the bench while the little girl she is with burned the rest of her energy. 

As my feet began to continue past the lady my heart said something completely opposite and honestly, kind of scary. “Go pray with her”, that little voice inside me whispered. As excuses began to play over and over in my head about how random and offensive that might be to the woman, another thought drowned them out.

“What if I don’t?” What if all that woman needed was a little bit of socializing and prayer to feel better and I let myself bail because I was too scared. What if I refused to do something God has clearly told me to do?

That moment I realized, that I wasn’t thinking of the woman in need. I was only being selfish and thinking of me. 

I immediately stopped and turned around. With my head down, I awkwardly walked to the woman and introduced myself.

I’m going to ask you something a little weird,” I said. “Is there anything you would like me to pray for?

With a shocked look on her face, the woman answered with an abrupt, “Yes” and she began telling me about the painful situation she is currently going through.

It turns out this brave woman’s back has gotten so bad that no doctors will work on it. From observation I could tell that the woman was trying her hardest to be there for her granddaughter, but with the recent conversations she has had with many doctors, and an extreme amount of pain, Trish didn’t know if that was possible.

After our conversation and prayer, I left but as I was running back home I realized that Trish wasn’t the only one that got something out of our conversation.

Run the Race of Endurance

{These graphics are free for you to enjoy}

You see, When God speaks sometimes what He asks is a little scary to us. My situation with that woman made me realize why that is.

We think,

What if I fail?

What if I’m offensive?

What if what God said, really isn’t what I should be doing?

Do you see the correlation with all of those thought’s?

It’s the letter “I” 

In the midst of stepping out it’s easy to forget that it’s not all about us. Matthew 6:27 says it best by asking all of us if our worries add a single moment to our life..

It doesn’t… Instead worrying takes away time we could be using to benefit the kingdom of God.

Jesus commanded us to tend His sheep (John 21:17) and on that run I realized that one of the ways I can worship God is by putting aside the doubt, doing what He asks of me, and loving those in need.

~ Lovelle ❤