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I get out of the car and walk to the entrance of the trail. This trail  used to bring me joy. Lately it’s caused, anger, frustration, and pain both literally and figuratively.

I guess you can say running was a hobby of mine. I practiced a lot and my body was used to long distances at a decent pace. I’d spent 3 years training my body and had worked really hard. I was finally content with the speed, distance, and pace I was able to do. I was even training for a marathon.

Then life happened… I found out I was pregnant and week later I found out that I needed foot surgery. After 3 years of practice running was officially off the table. When I say off the table I mean completely taken away from me. I couldn’t exercise at all due to pain in my foot.

I had my daughter 9 months later and 6 weeks after that I had the surgery to remove a nerve in my foot. Two months after the surgery  I FINALLY got the okay to run again. In total, I had gone about a year without running and boy was I in for a huge surprise.

The legs that used to be strong enough to carry me could barely make it half a mile. My lungs were screaming. My mind told me I could but my body seemed to be saying, “not happening.”  

This is life. You work really hard only to have huge set backs. You think to yourself, “why am I even trying” and are tempted to just give up. The adversary tries to fill our hearts with lies. We feel as if we aren’t capable or good enough.

We make excuses for why we shouldn’t even bother. We forget that falling down gives us endurance and allows us to withstand attacks from the enemy. Sometimes our race looks different. Theres a time to run really fast. There’s a time to jog and a time to walk. There’s a time for hills and a time for slopes.

It’s not just about the finish line. It’s about the lessons we learn as we run towards God. The struggles make us stronger and draw us closer to Him. So I am going to keep showing up and as I struggle I will ask God what He wants to teach me. Will you?

~ Lovelle.