Category Archives: Seeds for Your Soul

When The Struggle Is Real

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The future I had so eloquently planned flashed before my eyes and dissolved in an instant as I looked at not one, but two pregnancy tests that had results I did not want. “This can not be happening.” I said to myself.

I looked up and saw my astonished husband with a hint of excitement in his eyes. The one dream he had treasured in his heart for a long time had come true. Not in the timing we thought but the big digital letters that spelled out PREGNANT couldn’t lie. Our life was about to change drastically.

I would love to sit here and tell you I was so excited about this news. I wish I could say I took it well, jumped up and down praising God for this gift not all women get the chance to experience but that would be a total lie.

When I entered this new season I came in kicking and screaming.  Graduate school, my crazy unrealistic idea of financial peace, and all the other dreams I had of working a job outside of the home were gone. They were replaced with the thought of staying home because babies aren’t cheep and momma’s need to take care of them. Like my amazing mother does for me, I knew that I had to accept putting my desires on hold to give this child the best life possible just like Jesus did when he died on the cross for me.

It’s surprising I know… I wasn’t happy that I was pregnant when I first found out. I was actually really ticked off. My face and my words couldn’t hide it. The fake, “thank you’s” when the news broke brought a lot of skeptical looks and not a lot of people knew how to respond. I got a bunch of, “I’m sorry. You are supposed to be happy’s” silence, and awkward stares.

The adversary tried his hardest to trap me with guilt. Children are a gift from the Lord right? I had seen first hand how hard it is on women to look at those negative pregnancy tests month after month and not be able to carry one of their own. I knew the pain my mom and dad felt while enduring 10 years of infertility. I knew first hand how it felt to not be wanted and here I was doing the same thing to our future child…

So here I am ten weeks later (a little more stable) and a lot more excited. We are gonna have a baby!!! I ALMOST believed the lie that my feelings made me a horrible person. As I spent time with Jesus He held me close, listened to my feelings without judgment, and spoke truth into my life. He also brought a few people who had been there to help me through this crazy process.

These lies right here are why I am writing this post. This is for the person going through a similar situation where your reaction isn’t resonating with society. This is for the child of God who never fully embraced how they REALLY felt Friend, I give you full permission and guess what??? So does Jesus.

Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.”
– Luke 22:42

Yes, our wonderful Savior who entered this earth; cried out to God because He wasn’t necessarily happy about the huge request that God was asking of him. God got him through his doubts and questions without judgement. He even did it for me, and He will do it for you too.

I grieved the future I so badly wanted. I cried out to God asking for help. With one test our future became so uncertain. I REALLY needed Him to change my heart and in time He did. He didn’t tell me that I was wrong or a horrible person. He sat there with me in my selfishness and unrealistic expectations, accepted my truthful feelings, and held me close.  My hope is that by reading this I can do that for you too…

It’s okay to not be happy about life hitting you like a ton of bricks. It’s perfectly normal to not have the “correct feelings”. When you embrace it, God can start working on your heart and draw you closer to Him. I promise, when you tell God how you REALLY FEEL, He WILL will be there to listen.

~ Lovelle ❤

Thrive

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Then Jesus explained, “My nourishment comes from doing the will of God, who sent me, and from finishing his work.”
~ John 4:34

I’m not a mom but I have a dog and work with 10-15 teens 40 hours a week so that must count for something right? I’m hanging out with my friends at Raising Generations Today. I would love for you to join us! For your daily dose of encouragement click on over here.

If that doesn’t work the short link for this article is: http://wp.me/p39Ehj-1qT

~ Lovelle ❤

We Serve A Faithful God and The #DreamTogether Linkup

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As I look back at my life and where God has brought me I am overwhelmed with thankfulness. I feel like I’m on top of a mountain. After a long hard climb I am finally here in my promised land and I’m reaping the harvest of my endurance.

I’m hanging out with my friends at God- Sized Dreams today click here to see how I truly learned that God is not limited to our circumstances.

~ Lovelle ❤

The Truth Behind Our Mistakes and Trials

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“You sent your good Spirit to instruct them, and you did not stop giving them manna from heaven or water for their thirst…”
~ Nehemiah 9:20 NLT

Nehemiah 9 starts out solemn. The people of Israel realized they had fallen away from God again. They confessed their sins and worshipped their God. Then together in unison, the Israelites prayed to God and thanked Him for everything He had done for them.

Here are some of the things that they thanked Him for:

  • He made a covenant with Abraham. (Neh. 9:8)
  • He did what He promised because He was true to His word (Neh. 9:8)
  • He saved the Israelites from their slavery in Egypt and displayed signs to Pharaoh (Neh. 9:9-10)
  • He divided the sea and got the Israelites out of Egypt. (Neh. 9:11)
  • He led the Israelites by a pillar of cloud and fire to their promised land.(Neh. 9: 12)
  • He gave them bread from heaven when they were hungry and water from a rock when they were thirsty. (Neh. 9:15)

God literally provided everything for the Israelites. Here’s the thing; in the midst of the miracles listed, they still managed to sin a lot:

  • They completely disregarded God’s commands and forgot all He had done. (Neh. 9:16-17)
  • They worshipped idols. (Neh. 9:18)
  • They killed prophets who tried to warn them of the severity of their sin. (Neh. 9:26)

“Whenever your people turned and cried to you again for help, you listened once more from heaven. In your wonderful mercy, you rescued them many times.”
~ Nehemiah 9:28

It may be 2016 but sometimes I feel just like the Israelites. Life is like a roller coaster. Some days I feel like I do really good, while other days I feel like the worst human being on the planet. It’s an up and down ride of trial and error.

It’s in my darkest moments that I see God the most.

It’s when I am flat on my face crying out to God because trials come from every direction that I feel His presence more than ever. It’s in those moments that I can stand up and thank Him for every single thing that He has gotten me through and forgiven me for. I may forget sometimes but let me tell you friend, He’s done a lot;

  • He’s gotten me through homelessness
  • He’s walked with me through every single type of abuse
  • There were times when I hated Him, but He pursued me with His whole heart.
  • He’s been there when I was alone working full time trying to survive.
  • He’s instructed me on how to live a Christian life.
  • He’s taken me from Orphan to daughter.
  • He’s made me a wife.

Every single time I mess up He’s been there holding me. When I say, “Lord, I’m just not good enough.” He says, “That’s okay. That’s why I died on the cross.” 

Nehemiah 9 was my reminder that every trial is a testimony. Every mistake holds an opportunity for growth. I can rejoice in the hard times because those are the moments that God holds me ever so close…

~ Lovelle ❤

 

Wherever I Am God Is Enough

He Is Enough

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I had just graduated college. I worked so hard to get to that place and I was finally done. I thought to myself, “surely I will get hired quickly. I will figure out what to do with my life. I love speaking so God will open up doors for me to speak again right?”

I had these dreams and goals that I wanted to achieve immediately but God doesn’t work in our timing and life happens so I found myself in-between jobs. It seemed like God was completely silent. I had no offers to speak, and doors to potential jobs closed in every direction.

To make some money and occupy my time I began working at a thrift store where I had previously been employed. As  I sat there cleaning the dusty area filled with trinkets and vintage items I couldn’t help but cry out to God.

“Surely I am called for more than this God?”

I asked that question a lot. Every time I cleaned the bathrooms and sorted through clothes I would ask Him again. As time went on God started refining my heart. He whispered into my heart. “Lovelle, I am enough.

It doesn’t matter where I am. If I am a garbage person, a cashier, the CEO of a prestigious company, a stay at home momma, or a speaker. I can do anything and everything my heart desires but if God isn’t my contentment then nothing I do will ever be good enough. My life will be completely worthless.

“Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ”
~ Philippians 3:8

HE IS ENOUGH

As time went on I did in fact get a job offer. It’s not my ending point but it is going to give me tools I will need in the future and I get to make a difference. Where God has placed me now is enough.

When I get discouraged and lose contentment I will hold on to those words. Will you join me? Friend, He has you right where He wants you. A God that knows every hair on your head is surely putting you where you are for a reason.

~ Lovelle ❤

Bringing Life To Our Thoughts

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“How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!”
~ Psalms 139:17-18

We all know that words hurt, and that includes words we say about ourselves. I don’t know about you, but I am my biggest critic. The word says to give grace, love, and mercy, and I do it to everyone but myself.

It’s hard to speak life into what we do and who we are and it’s awfully easy to talk bad about our weight, body image, mistakes, and sins.

How amazing is it to serve a God that thinks precious thoughts about us? He is crazy about us. Once we ask forgiveness we are as white as snow.

Oh how easy it is to forget…

He never leaves us and even in our darkest moments He walks beside us. Today, let’s take a step back and remember what God thinks about us. Remember friends… His thoughts for us are only good.

~ Lovelle ❤

Speaking and Believing Truth

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It seems like everyday we battle with lies the adversary tries to make us believe. Between comparison and hurtful comments we hear, it’s easy to think the battle is lost. Our hearts are captivated by thoughts like;

You’re not smart enough.
You can’t do it. 
You’re not loved.
You’re not good enough

Don’t believe it. It is so important to listen to God and allow Him to speak truth into the lies that the adversary tries to fill you with. Guess what?

You are wanted (Romans 5:8).
You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).
You are enough (Ephesians 2:10).

God knitted you together and he lovingly made you for a reason. In whatever messy, confused, and hurting place you may be in, God sees a purpose in you and He know’s it’s good.

Believe it.
Read it.
Most importantly…. please, please know it deep within your precious heart.

You are not the things people say. You are not what you have done in the past. You are not defined by the situation you are in right now. What you are my friend, is loved.

~ Lovelle ❤